| I SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN BED bed. I think July, 16th, will qualify as one of those days for me for the rest of my life. My name is Susan; I am a 59 year old realtor, who wants to sell a million dollar plus home. I haven't done that yet, but today is the day, I have an open house, and I know the Karma is with me and I will SELL today. My broker has put an ad in the newspaper (which is quite a financial commitment to selling this house because open house ads run about $300.00 for three days), she has also sent out over 100 post cards to neighbors announcing the open house and inviting folks to stop by. So I was excited and prepared. I have selected the outfit of the day and it is laid out and ready to go. All the paperwork is in my briefcase, including a partially filled out sales contract, I am feeling positive with my trusty mortgage calculator, electronic key, and cell phone, I am armed and ready to sell. Jack Russell, my mixed breed dog, and I have decided to sleep in since we are organized and all prepared for the day. I hear Jack take himself out his dog door this morning for his morning pee pee. Thinking all is right with the world I turn over and sleep until 9:30 am. When I awaken Jack is cuddled up in our white chenille blanket right next to me. Jack is my angel baby. Well I better get up and get going, as I slip out of bed for my morning trip to the bathroom, I put my feet on the rug but something isn’t right. I feel something under my foot. I know you think oh oh Jack made a poo poo, but no, it is hard and it sort of scratches my foot. I grab my glasses so I can see what I have stepped on. I start screaming and doing the I don’t like it dance…he has brought his mommy a dead mole. Jack grabs it and runs - he is afraid I will take away his gift. Now, if you have never seen a mole, they are one ugly animal, they look like a mouse with big hands. When we first met he was laying on his back with all four paws up in the air dead as a door nail. Yes, Jack's one passion in life besides barking is catching moles in the back yard. This did not start my day off very well. Jack has taken his furry friend out to the back yard and every time I try to pick him up with my plastic Wal-mart bag; Jack picks him up and runs. What a fun game first thing in the morning. Needless to say I finally get the dead thing and mummified it in the Wal-mart bag and toss it in the outdoor trash can. Great start for my big day but I am determined to stay positive and sell, sell, sell. Being the middle of July in Florida it is hot and humid. It never seems so hot until you start to get dressed to go somewhere. That is when the sweat works begin. I have rolled my hair up for that especially professional look and I am applying my makeup. Needless to tell anyone in Florida what happens next. The sweat starts running down my face from my head. Well, the best options seems to be leaving the curlers in until I get around the corner from the open house. To stop the sweat I take 3 of the round cotton makeup pads and put them on my forehead to catch the sweat that is trickling off my head. Time to go and I am ready! I just have a few stops to make on the way. My first stop is at the drug store. I jump out and run in to see my favorite pharmacist. He is just so nice and soooo cute. I stop to see him for any reason I can think of , but today I am on a mission to pick up some stay calm medicine. I am all dressed up and I saunter back to the pharmacy department….looking good. Ernie smiles and says how can he help me today, I always have thoughts about how he could help me but I am on a mission. “Just here to pick up my medicine.” Ernie keeps smiling and comes back with the medicine and asks, “Did you hurt yourself”. Hurt myself? No I am just fine; I’m on the way to an open house. “What made you ask me that?” Well the cotton pads across your forehead. Oh Shit, I forgot to take them off and to take out the pink and blue rollers too. Shit, Shit, Shit. I wasn’t feeling so saucy on the way out and the zip was going out of my step. These things only happen to me and he didn’t even know I couldn’t find my hairbrush to bring along and had to borrow Jacks. I really need those stay calm pills. The open house is lovely and they have a golden lab. As I walk in he is so glad to see me he jumps up on me and pees down my leg and I get a puddle in my shoes. He does make a little piddle when he is excited the owner says. A little piddle, not with a golden lab it was more like a dam breaking. That was the last straw. As you can guess the open house goes off without another hitch, except no sale. I could have sure saved myself time, gas, and embarrassment if I had just stayed in bed today. The wonderful life of a Realtor. Believe it or not this is a true story. |
Representing Buyers Swann & Associates Real Estate Inc. 100 Rialto Place, Suite 704 Melbourne, FL Call Direct: 321-253-6032 Office: 321-541-1218 sstanley2008@cfl.rr.com |
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PELICAN BEACH AT AQUARINA SEA HAWK PLACE AT AQUARINA PHASE RIVER OAKS AT AQUARINA II LANSING ISLAND EAU GALLIE BY THE SEA HARBOUR LIGHTS THE WILLOWS PHASE SUNNYLAND BEACH INDIALANTIC BY THE SEA HARBOR EAST OCEAN SHORES OAK PARK AT SUNTREE GRANT ISLAND ESTATES HOG POINT RIVERS EDGE SUBD HACIENDA DEL SOL ESTATES RIO LINDO BEAUJEANS PLAT OF MELBOURNE EGRETS COVE WYNDHAM LAKE ESTATES THE WILLOWS TRANQUILITY STILL POINT CASABELLA ARUNDEL - BAYTREE SUMMER LAKES CHAROLAIS ESTATES WYNDHAM AT DURAN |
I love to write little stories.
They are usually about me
and my life. What else do I
know that I can write about
and not get sued? Would you
like to hear about the lady who
lost her underwear while
viewing a house with me?
Sorry I can't tell those stories
but crazy things do happen!
They are usually about me
and my life. What else do I
know that I can write about
and not get sued? Would you
like to hear about the lady who
lost her underwear while
viewing a house with me?
Sorry I can't tell those stories
but crazy things do happen!